Sympathy?
I'll cry with you if I have to
I'll try and make you laugh
I'll stand by you if you feel alone
I'll be your company
I'll sit with you when you want to cry
I'll try and convince you that your life is worth living
But if you want sympathy, go somewhere else.
Don't expect me to feel sorry for you
Don't expect me to try and snatch that rope away from your hands
Don't expect me to cry because you think you can't "be strong anymore"
Don't expect me to beg you to stop hurting yourself in the ways I do to myself just so you can make a trade
I hate you when you get like this
You want to kill yourself?
You want to hurt?
You want to torture your own mind?
Lie to yourself?
Cry yourself to sleep?
Cling on?
Fine.
Go ahead and fucking do it.
Don't tell me your grand plans.
You want to die?
Then don't give me the gun to keep.
I want NO part in this.
Just leave me alone.
I need no more nightmares.
You are weak and pathetic.
And you fall further in my eyes every single day
The joker was right
Even the best of us fall
Well, you know what I've realized?
I never liked the best amongst us much anyway.
Comments
The part when you say, if you want sympathy go somewhere eIse... saying that to someone who is a habbituaI sucka for sympathy makes sense, cuz then no amount of sympathy if you were to show wouId ever suffice... to anyone eIse who is deaIing for the first time with suppressed feeIings that have made him into something he did not pIan, wouId make sense too (if you dont IiteraIIy mean it) cuz every sound mind needs to Iearn sometime or the other that sympathy reaIIy doesn't heIp; for if anything does, its recognition of what went wrong and an advice how to deaI with it if needed... the point being when you say 'if you want sympathy, so somewhere eIse', I hope you mean, I offer you more than sympathy and not fuck off if you want sympathy :P
ahem, the next point is 'hurting yourself in the ways I do to myself' is by for the farest trade of them aII... and how wouId you caII someone weak and pathetic for that? I mean compare him to yourseIf and not what you expect cuz in generaI everyone expects more than they offer themseIves...
...Well, you know what I've realized? I never liked the best amongst us much anyway... this is so ruthIess, after aII the good advice in your poem, this Iine Ieaves nothing for keeps and nothing to fight for... I cannot express how fucked up it is when you say ' I never liked the best amongst us much ANYWAY!!' cuz then you first hint fouI pIay (yes, it is fouI pIay) and then suggest that you don't care four fIying fucks ANYWAY...
im sorry if something I said doesnt come out straight cuz i find no way doing so without being tooo preachy... and i'm not trying to put you down... m onIy making an effort to write cuz first this poem is obviousIy raw and good and then reading your previous materiaI makes me beIieve that for you better sense prevaiIs...
When I say "If you want sympathy, go somewhere else", it isn't about who I'm saying it too. It's about who is saying it. that was me at a point where everyone around me was having their world crumble and I didn't know what to do. I also didn't know what they wanted me to do. It's not like any one of the wanted to fix it. No, they wanted me to watch them burn... and I can't do that. I really really can't. I can try and save you. But I can't just watch you drown.
When I say "if you want sympathy, go somewhere else", it means exactly that. I offer no sympathy when it's asked for. Rephrase - I can offer no sympathy when it's asked for. What I give you - what I can give you - is company and friendship and cheer... not sympathy.
I am not comparing them to myself. I am comparing them to whatever standard I have set for us all. We all have our reasons to hurt yes? People are generally twisted masochistic beings, no matter how sane they may pretend to be.And you always have your reasons for hurting. All I mean is, don't make me your reason for hurting. Don't make me your reason for anything. I'm sorry if that sounds mean and cruel, but I don't WANT to be a reason. I can't handle the power, and I sure as hell can't take the responsibility!
Besides, how d you know I don't consider myself to be weak and pathetic? Perhaps I loathe myself to such an extent that the fact that someone comes to my level makes me hate them with the same intensity!
As for "I never liked the best amongst us much anyway"... *smiles sadly* It's a statement dear. It comes from anger and pain, yes... But it also comes from memories. And ones that won't easily be over-written. Ruthless? Is that what it's come to? Well... I suppose sometimes one has to be that... You know? Just sometimes...
I did not really get what you meant by the foul play angle though. Elaborate?
This was written in a mental state that I can only look back at and shake my head. We all go through those moments when the whole world seems to be blowing itself up and you're given the job of being the bomb squad. Not fun. Especially when you get the feeling that half those bombs are self designed anyway, if you get what I mean.
Once again, I'm confused about better sense. What do you mean?
I am glad that you made an effort to analyze my post. It's pretty cool that you took the time out and everything.
*bows*
I hope my reply has been to your satisfaction. Please do not hesitate to comment on anything here... I doubt I shall be posting here again though... However, I shall always return to check how all of you are doing...
Cheers!
By foul play i meant that if you never liked the best amongst us much anyway then why was there an US in the first place? Tacky subject.
by better sense i meant that i found your posts that ive read before to be rather utopian than masochistic
impulsive writing is beautiful in a way that requires a lot of typing.... so i will not... i hope you keep doing this ;)
*smiles*
@default god
*giggles*
Sorry?