3 posts tagged “empty”

It really is quite funny. Swore I wouldn't go buy vegetables these hols. Had to do that already. Swore I wouldn't meet a single law-schoolite, especially not a first year. Already met lin.

So how do I like this place? Well, I've been out the whole day. Mum, Dad and I left at around 10 in the mornin. Went to a whole lotta banks, K's school and then the mall. I HATE banks almost as much as I hate buying vegetables!!!, I'm freaked out bout K coz I can't stop thinkin about the line of ppl in Law School from his school. err... They're all really nice, but still... -_-... oooh, Hi Robert-san. err... No, I never said you were strange. heh. *nervous laugh*

Anyhow, yes, the mall! *desperately tryin to change the subject* I did buy a lot of food and clothes. *nods* I bought many tops, a shirt, a skirt and this really nice green dress. I love it. Mother did not want me to buy it, but then again, neither did she want me to buy the skirt. I guess that's what the problem is with being a don't-give-a-fuck kid. I wore whatever they got me for so long, they just can't see the fact that I AM almost 19, and once in a while, I like wearing something that isn't from their century. *shakes head* Never mind. I guess I'll always be 7 in their eyes...

Lets see. What else did I buy? Well, Pringles must be mentioned! The rest of it is just general stuff I guess. We got back at bout 1900. Oooh, I finally did have a hot dog today. *sighs dreamily* Finally!

Anyhow, the rest of the day was ok... There was a little yelling in the middle. I ran out though. Met Lin and then as I was supposed to buy vegetables and yoghurt, set off to find 'Mother Dairy'. I got lost on my way though... But to be honest, It was kinda nice. I like being lost. No... I guess... I like looking for the way. It isn't very essential that I find it, but I do love looking for it...

Am having the weird sort of sweet yoghurt that I got. Hmm... It's kinda strange, but it is yoghurt, so ^_^
Anyhow, I need a cigarette. Am goin crazy livin here. I'd say I can't wait for college to begin, but i'm not done recharging yet...

Cya later...

Where do I begin?...
Iv been sittin here starin at the blank screen for so long, but I guess this isnt goin to write itself... I might as well begin...

So many promises. Of things returnin to normal. Of people stayin the same. Of things never changin.

Stupid really.
I hate promises.
I didnt always I guess...
There must have been a time when I believed in them...
Not anymore.

Sounds cynical?
Maybe
But I really dont care.

Cause people lie.
And they destroy.
And they ruin lives.
But most importantly, they break promises...
Over and over
I dont understand...
Why give ur word, if you're goin to go back on it anyway?

Nothins okay...
And Im tired of hearin that one day it will be...
Coz that days not today
And Im tired of waiting...

Its no big deal...
I can see the moon in the distance...
If I leav soon enough I can still make it...
I dont want to look back...
Dont hold me back with your words...
Let me go...
I'll find my own way...
I dont know where im goin...
All I know is I need to get away...

I amnt goin to anyplace
I am goin away from here
I have to...
Maybe I'm headin to hell
Maybe there's nothin but pain waitin for me...
It doesnt matter
Anything is better than this nothingness
Anythin at all...
Hurt me, I beg you
Let me feel the pain...
Dont try n take the pain away
I hav nothin else with me...
Dont try to make me feel better...
Pain doesnt hurt when its all you'ver ever felt
And it feels better than nothingness...
It feels...
And I need to feel...