11 posts tagged “pissed”

I'll cry with you if I have to
I'll try and make you laugh
I'll stand by you if you feel alone
I'll be your company
I'll sit with you when you want to cry
I'll try and convince you that your life is worth living

But if you want sympathy, go somewhere else.

Don't expect me to feel sorry for you
Don't expect me to try and snatch that rope away from your hands
Don't expect me to cry because you think you can't "be strong anymore"
Don't expect me to beg you to stop hurting yourself in the ways I do to myself just so you can make a trade

I hate you when you get like this

You want to kill yourself?
You want to hurt?
You want to torture your own mind?
Lie to yourself?
Cry yourself to sleep?
Cling on?

Fine.
Go ahead and fucking do it.
Don't tell me your grand plans.

You want to die?
Then don't give me the gun to keep.
I want NO part in this.
Just leave me alone.
I need no more nightmares.

You are weak and pathetic.
And you fall further in my eyes every single day

The joker was right
Even the best of us fall
Well, you know what I've realized?
I never liked the best amongst us much anyway.

No.
Really.

History paper.

SUCKED!

It was especially bad coz it went way worse than it should have. I mean, I actually fuckin read for this. Read the original articles and books.

No women's movement
No Communalism
No Gandhi

*sigh*

Oh well, its over with. Hopefully, not just for now. I really really don't want a carry.

Next up: Consti. 29th.

This post was supposed to be about my lazy sunday, how its over and how dismal it makes me feel. Maybe I would have thrown in the part about cutting my hair by candlelight because there was no electricity and I was just that bored. Perhaps I would have even talked about how I spent nearly an hour with the firt years at the barbed wire, but I just chanced upon this group on facebook, and my curiousity and blood have begun to boil.

Well, if curiousity can boil, that is...

"Lets see if we can get 1,000,000 Hindu's yeahhh!!!"

*sigh*

I don't even know what to say. When will this end?

And if that wasn't enough, I next saw a group called "GODSEGIRI-Acts Of Shri Shri Nathuram Godse".

There's a reason curiousity killed the cat.

This is what the group says:

"For how many days shall hindus stand as meek observers to all that is happening in THEIR country ? Why do hindus live in fear of a minority in THEIR OWN country?

Enough is enough."

And it proceeds to say

"Hindutva is not hatred for other religions. Hindutva is a way of leading life as a Hindu with tolerance and respect for others. It is the oldest religion growing at tremendous pace.

Dont submit your minds to the PSEUDO SECULARISTS. Be a proud hindu and say with pride that you are a hindu."

The old me would have just sighed, shook her head in exasperation and moved on. But I can't explain how sick and tired I am of maniacal fanaticism everywhere I look. I know I should just forget it and stop giving these people any attention, but I can't help it.

What do they want? A country full of "hindus"? What does that even mean? What would it achieve?

Its people like this who make me wish I could have truly been born religion-less.

Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against the religion itself. But I sure as hell have something against the kind of people "belonging" to any religion and believing that it actually matters.

How?

This reminds me of the time I was in St. T. and those girls made a circle around me asking me "what my religion" was and "what kind of Christian" I was.

I'm sick of the word itself.

Religion.

I wish I could erase it from the very memories of humanity.

*sigh*

I know it has its own purpose. I know gods are more often than not just memories of mortals who were heroes once upon a time. And I'm sure they deserve to be remembered...

But at what cost?

I didn't have time to finish the cursed paper!!!
Gah!!!
And the last question, if only I had time to read it!!! I knew the answer!!!
:(

*sigh*
Oh well, no use thinkin bout it right?

Tmrw's consti... and I need some insane number to pass!
Must study, I do NOT want 4 repeats...
I can't flunk 1st year after reachin 3rd trim without a carry...
Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!

AAAANNND tomorrow is the 5th year party.
Brilliant.
just fuckin brilliant!

*sigh*

I actually get tired of people who can't ever find anything nice to say about anyone. They try so hard to make sure they aren't taken in by popular belief that they end up caring more than they should bout what people think.
It's very paradoxical, not to mention confusing.
And its annoying.

Don't judge me when you don't know me.
I hate sittin and listening as they go on and on about every single person, as if running through a list, and give reasons why they're pathetic people... I just think that kinda talkin makes you really pathetic. It IS annoying. Its always annoyed me...

I'm just glad that I can still get annoyed like this. Lol. I thought I was immune to it! Its nice knowing I'm not completely... not yet anyway, so YAY! ^_^

Apart from that bit of ranting, I had my viva today. apparently a large bit of it was cogged. The part S.G was supposed to do. My friends want me to go talk to sir or something... but I just can't. *sigh* It just doesn't seem like the right thing to do... I dunno. Brilliant. Now, it's definitely gonna be all 4 courses!

Gah!!!

Which reminds me, must go back to studyin Consti. Bah. Why can't these ppl write shorter articles. God, I havn't read a single case yet and I don't even know how many are coming this time. Luckily I'd read a bit of Tomkins before, so that's done. I don't feel like reading Barendt... Oh my, I sound like such a nerd!!!
-_-

Aaaaaaaaaaaaargh!!!
You and your stupid games!
I'm done playing!
...
...
...
Why?
I don't know what bothers me more...
The fact that I probably don't understand... or that I think I actually may...

At the end of the stupid day, vodka is all you have...
*shakes head*
*glares*
and all you frikkin need!

You and your stupid mind games can go to HELL!

*laughs*
Am back to this song...
Well, it has been a while...
Has anything changed?
...

Ecstacy is now really all I need...
Literally...
And it's all I have...
Vain? Am I vain?... I dunno...
Now my world IS way too fast...
I don't even know where its going. Which direction... if there's any direction at all.
It's all just a haze... a blur...
None of it is real... and it doesn't matter whether it is or not, coz either way... none of it is going to last...

In love?
Why would you be in love with me?
*shakes head*
It's a mistake.
And its not true that I don't care...
*smiles sadly*
That's why I run away...
I don't wanna hurt you...

My anger into lust?
I don't even think thats possible... and even if it is.. I don't know how to...
I do trust you...
With my life... just not with my soul...

Don't wait for me...
Love?
Isn't there...
Sex
Can't be there unless there's love...
loneliness
...
Why would I take that from you?
...

Don't ask me to take what I want...
I don't know what I want...
GO AWAY!

You can't be in love with sins...
Not mine.
Not anyone's...
Stop waiting...
...

I don't fear desire... Do I?
*shakes head*
I do...
It'll consume us all...
I must leave...
Don't love me...
I can't take this anymore...
I am drowning...
I WON'T take you down with me...
My bitter pills are all that stay... all that I allow to stay...

Am I all or not?
I don't think I know the difference anymore..
...
...

*smiles*
Yeah, you're right...
The only reason you would stay is if you were blind...
Don't wait darling...
I'm long gone..
and even if I was to stay...
you'd leave, ne?

Then...
I guess there really is no point...
...
...
...

Why can’t people just mind their own business?

It’s so totally PISSING off.

-_-

No, I don’t care what you say.

How hard is it to understand that?

We may be friends, but you have no right to tell me what to do and who to talk to.

I don’t give a f*ck if it IS jus coz you’re “worried”

Butt out bitch.

-_-

Sorry

Just really really ticked off right now

Should’ve just whacked her head off with the kendo stick

-_-

You know, it's only now that I realize what a sheltered life I'd really lived.

Horrors are horrors... I'm talkin bout daily life here...

The Navy is an amazing place to grow up in. For the first 17 years of my life, the words "caste", "society", "religious discrimination", etc meant NOTHING to me. They were just words I read in the newspaper. And I laughed at the stupidity of the small number of people- or so I thought- that were still obsessed with these immaterial things...

But then... I had my one year at college in K-land. Even then... I believed that it was a freak thing, and the only real barrier was one of communication. I refused to believe that our country could still be a place where it mattered what caste or religion you were born in, and the concept of pure blood still existed...

But now...
All my doubts have been crushed into tiny little pieces... as has much of my belief in ours being a truly secular country. Everyone says it doesn't really matter where you're from, but it's such a part of everyday conversation and thought... it scares me... but more than that, it angers me. I hate the way it has crept into every day of my life. I hate knowing that no matter what I say or do, the first thing so many around me will want to know is where I am from. What the F*CK does that have to do with anything???
(Sorry bout the censoring, my coll will block access to my own site if I do not do so. -_-)

I loathe the question "Where are you from?", and I'm glad I have no one answer to give. I'm relieved that there is no one state or caste I must 'belong' to. "Belong to". I belong to no one. To nothing. Specially not some dumb ancient system just because I was born in one house and not another. If I want to belong somewhere, I am gonna be the one deciding where, not my 'lineage', not my blood. Me.

At home, religion was never a big thing. Yeah, once in a while, mum would light some incense and then me and my brother would fight over who would get to twirl it around the few god pictures in the house. But that was pretty much it. We never had forced temple visits, or family prayers. Some may say that it brings about better 'family harmony'. I think playin UNO accomplishes that way more easily... and it's more fun too!

And then there's all the shocked gasping people who ask me how I dare say I don't believe in God. Firstly, it's none of their business. Secondly, it's not like I don't believe in God, I just don't believe in their Gods. Any of theirs. Religion is nothing but another reason to be divided. Oh sure, it unites people, brings different people together, promotes harmony, blah blah. But it also gets people killed... and frankly, I'd rather everyone live in relative isolation than be murdered just because they fast in the name of different supernatural beings.